The Long Game

On Being Where You Are

They don’t tell you that it’s a long game.

Instead, they tell you that this course of treatment is supposed to stick. That you should be able to eat the meals they assign to you and attend the day-long group sessions until insurance cuts and you’re kicked out; weight-restored and raw.

They tell you that CBT and DBT should be enough to stop the urge and kick the habit. That you should re-enter the world fully strapped, loaded, and resourced for a life of recovery.

They tell you that food freedom is the answer to your biggest qualms, as if it’s food you need to be free from and healing is as simple as learning to enjoy a spontaneous cookie. That health can be found at every size and peace is yours if you just throw away the scale.

According to them, it’s simple. Start today and you’ll be rid of Ed by next month. After all, it only takes four weeks to change, right?

I think about it often: this impossibly long game for which none of us are truly prepped and readied.